Pew! Pew! Pew! If you don’t know already that’s laser gun sounds as made by my mouth. That’s my comment about Star Guard by Vacuum Flowers! That’s it! Kidding of course… this game is more fun than playing Star Wars with your 7-year-old friends and arguing who’s going to be Han Solo and who’s going to be Darth Vader! “I get to be Darth Vader!” “But you’re always Darth Vader!” “I have the inhaler! Plus I know how to use the Dark Side of the force!” “I get Han Solo, because I’m cooler than you!” “But I don’t want to be Luke Skywalker, how come you guys always get Darth Vader and Han Solo?!?” “Because you’re just a kid” “I’m six years old!” “But we’re 7 now grab your lightsaber Luke, I am your father!” Well Star Guard is even better than that!
Note: While trying to be funny it may have sounded as sarcastic, but really Star Guard is retro-style-gaming-goodness and a side of fries! Here’s the video to prove it:
I almost should just leave it at this like I did with Space Spy, only in this case it would be because of how awesome it is, instead of, well… I’ll just leave it there. Anyways if you want to know more continue on…
We’re not talking about an episode of that new-fangled Dr. Who here. We’re talking about the ghosts of 
Obviously rocks can’t cook, I mean, they have absolutely no utensils. You could cook some rocks though. Well it wouldn’t make for a tasty meal, but you could toast them with laser fire! You know. Beep…… Boop…… Beep……. Boop……. Jing-jing-jing. Beep… Boop… Beep… Boop… Jing-jing. Do-de-do-de-do-de-do-de-do. Beep. Boop. Beep. Boop. Jing-jing-jing. Pash! Next ship. Okay so the beeps and boops is the music or background ambient sound, the jing-jing is the sound of the laser fire, the do-de-do is that little flying saucer that comes out for extra bonus points, and the “Pash” is the sound of your ultimate demise. Okay so it’s hard to faithfully reproduce the sounds of